My Mother Has a Key to My Flat
Karim's mother still lets herself into his apartment to reorganise the kitchen. He uses his own story to explain how to take a key back without starting a war or a week of silence.
My Brother Borrowed Money and Nobody Mentions It
0:00 / 0:48
Sample the first 60 seconds free. Sign up free or log in to hear the whole episode.
Show notes
This week's door
Dina from Alexandria lent her brother the equivalent of a year of savings for his wedding. Eighteen months later nobody has mentioned it, and when she tried, her father said family does not keep accounts.
- Why lending to family feels like a gift you did not agree to give
- The eldest daughter tax, and why Dina was expected to say yes
- Separating the money from the relationship so you can talk about either
- A call from Riyadh: the brother's side, told by a brother who still owes
- How to ask for repayment in a way your father cannot call shameful
Next week: relatives who ask when you are having children, and what to say the fourth time.
Transcript
Ahlan wa sahlan, this is A Door, Not a Wall, and I am Karim. Tonight's story comes from Dina in Alexandria, and I will warn you now, half of you will recognise it. Two years ago Dina's younger brother got engaged. The wedding needed money. Dina, the eldest, the responsible one, the one with a job at a bank, lent him most of what she had saved. Everyone said how good she was. Eighteen months later the money has not come back, and when Dina gently raised it at dinner, her father put down his fork and said, in this family we do not keep accounts. So tonight we talk about money, about birth order, about what we expect from eldest daughters, and about how to ask for what is yours without anyone calling you shameful. You are listening on Witspeak Podcasts.
Open as text